Uber Rides: An Opportunity to Connect
Spending your every Uber ride in uncomfortable silence is a wasted opportunity for meaningful connection. You’ll get from point A to point B, but you may be missing a game-changing conversation or chance to improve the course of one’s day. Some of the strangest, most beautiful short relationships I’ve formed have been behind the closed doors of a stranger’s sedan. Whether it be sharing and receiving insight, or a short therapy session, there’s much to be gained from engaging with the character leading your Uber trek.
A person you don’t know invited you into their personal vehicle, so why not make an effort to interact? It would be weirder not to say anything. You have nothing to lose by inquiring about them, nor by relaying your own life and experiences. Your driver, more often than not, knows nothing about you aside from your name on the app. Rarely do you share mutual friends. There’s every reason to practice honesty and be a good listener.
For me, the short rides are like haircuts but with more privacy. Within the span of time it takes to get a trim, my hairdresser will usually get to know everything about me. I force them aboard my rough sail of life and open up honestly about where I’m at currently, in terms of my state of mind and any troubles I’m undergoing. Whether they want to hear my musing and rambling isn’t of any importance — I’m paying them, and I just might be spicing up their drag of a day. I do of course ask them plenty of questions, because I’m genuinely curious, and listening to someone frequently benefits both parties. By inquiring and absorbing I step outside of myself for a bit, and give another person the opportunity to confide and get a weight off their chest. Those quick, worthwhile connections can be the highlight of my day. I wish it to be for them as well.
I treat Uber rides very much the same way, but with heightened heart-to-heart. As long as no severe language barrier lays between the driver and myself, I always exit an Uber feeling as though we’re both more whimsical and less stressed for the experience. Small talk doesn’t exist on my trips. My drivers, no matter how different from I, delve into the realest of discussions. We chat spirituality, ambitions, relationships, familial relations, and passions — Anything that drives us through life, both overt and underlying.
When my Uber man doesn’t speak the greatest English, we somehow always dig to the core of a God dialogue. I don’t need an explanation as to how or why we get there; we just get down to it. They relay how God works in their lives, and I elaborate on my own concept of a higher power. Regardless of how closely our beliefs align, we’re typically left firmer in our faiths. I picked up 3 new spiritual and mediation books recently, based solely on the recommendation of Uber drivers.
Since moving back to Philadelphia, I’ve been paired with several drivers who mirror my love of rap music. 4 of them have revealed their goals in the field of rapping and producing. Understandably, I’ve rapped and freestyled for those exact 4 people. The result of my nonsense: I now have 4 different Uber drivers texting me on a weekly basis, asking me to get in the studio with them. We’re some unlikely duos, and that’s merely a small part of the beauty in this. Through a taxi alternative I’ve built relationships with talented individuals who possess passions similar to mine, and it wouldn’t have happened if I didn’t take the stride to converse. I hear a song playing and inquire about their favorite artists. Exhibiting our gifts, by some means, always seems to transpire.
Prior to the relocation back to Philadelphia I lived in Denver, and for an embarrassingly short while in Los Angeles. As my absurdly quick and nonsensical life in Los Angeles came to a close, I Ubered to the bus station for my expedition back to Denver. My navigator on the trek was an older Korean man. After the initial standard exchange, he mentioned how he picked me up immediately after dropping his daughter off at college. He was saddened to see her leave, and worried about her new freedom. All I could do was convey my own college experience.
I admitted the newfound freedom caused my out of control spiral, yet the misery I ended up in was an essential obstacle on my path to discovery. Obviously this steered me towards necessary reflection. He told me he took this second job with Uber to help pay her way through college. His dedication, work ethic, and love for her brought a bittersweet smile to my face. I began thinking about my father, and the lovely life he has given me. He paid most of my way through school. He was aiding in my trip back to Denver. He worked over 40 years to provide for my sisters and I, because he believed in us, much like this man did in his daughter. In that very moment I developed a whole new gratitude for everything my dad had done, and a major admiration for this man in the driver’s seat. Based on what I gathered about him, he raised his daughter well, and I assured him she would excel in college.
Over the years I’ve stumbled upon many a great conversation in Ubers, but it was last night’s talk that spurred me to write this. Yesterday evening I met up with a high school buddy who recently moved back to Philly. After 5 wonderful hours of catching up and planning what’s to come for both of us, I called an Uber for the ride home. As the driver pulled up, I hugged my friend goodbye and remarked, “This was one of those meant to be moments.” I hopped in the backseat ready for my usual jabber, but not expecting anything profound.
The driver and I kicked it off by comparing the sections of Philly based on affordability. I confessed to being in a very tough situation, in which I have only a few days to find new housing. He made his highly welcomed recommendations. We then moved onto career chat. He’s a chef by day and driver by night. Additionally he just started his own business. “I envy your ambition and work ethic,” I admitted.
I went on to reveal I’ve always been somewhat jealous of “business-minded” individuals. Some people are wired to make money, and I’m not one of them. I ran him through the laundry list of creative endeavors I’ve delved into throughout my life. Part of that run through included claiming that I never committed myself enough to anything. Nothing materialized because I couldn’t dive in full-force. I’ve been lazy, inconsistent, and not smart in regards to the business aspect.
He embedded in me many wise words, and set off structuring the right frame of mind. It’s possible I had heard some of his advice before, but last night I was in a place at which I could truly absorb. He told me, “You’re a writer, and you provide a service. You need to make people want that service, and want to pay you for it. Your creativity is your business.” It’s a simple thought process, but how often do we apply it? I don’t believe I’ve ever taken it into consideration.
He then related his Uber gig to my writing and performing. “I treat Uber like a business,” he claimed. “When I make this a business, I service the customers as though it is, and this business becomes a career. If you make something just a job, it will be just a job.” All of what he spouted was sound, eye-opening guidance.
Lastly he translated some advice his mother constantly gave him: “Preparation before opportunity.” At face value it doesn’t seem to hold much meaning. After analyzing, however, it’s a combination of words that might sincerely benefit one through the process of life. When opportunity arises, we may not be ready to jump on it. We may not even recognize it. Also, we’re not always quite certain what it is we’re preparing for. But when we take all necessary action, work hard, learn to accept, practice gratitude, and put all we have into what we love we’ll be prepared when a door finally opens.
It goes without saying, but I built a lot more character than I thought I would simply by stirring discussion with that man. Following the vital conversation we arrived at my house. As we bid one another farewell, he called out, “It was one of those meant to be moments, just like you told your friend.”
I would like to believe I’ve provided all my Uber drivers with riveting tales and memorable interaction, but I realize now they’ve given more than I could have hoped to give them. Through a countless series of rides I’ve garnered contacts in my field. I’ve gained a stronger ability to appreciate what I have. I’ve received lifelong bits of guidance to keep at the forefront of my mind forever. I may have granted drivers a little entertainment, but they’ve hit me with learning experience after learning experience. Even the angry Trinidadian guy who berated me for being a smoker was solely trying to help.
You needn’t be the most gregarious person on the planet to partake in the magic of Uber conversation. Again, you genuinely have nothing to lose by opening up to a stranger. Next time a driver asks, “How are you,” tell them how you really are. Admit you’re stressing over a big change, or downtrodden after a breakup. They likely won’t fix your every issue, but you could almost definitely hear insightful words if you choose to listen. At the very least you’ll release stressors and have a decent discussion. Share your experiences and be open to theirs. You both may very well be better people after that ride.
